We Are Now France And The Year Just Became 1789

If this doesn’t get what’s left of American sanity in a boiling mad uproar, then we are truly lost.

I REALLY wish that this was from The Onion, but it appears to be a real story:

A fund manager for Smith Barney is getting off without felony charges after he allegedly ran over a cyclist with his Mercedes and fled the scene in Eagle, Colorado, because, the DA says, felony charges would be bad for the fund manager’s business.

Martin Joel Erzinger will not be charged with a felony because “Felony convictions have some pretty serious job implications for someone in Mr. Erzinger’s profession,” according to District Attorney Mark Hurlbert.

Erzinger oversees over $1 billion in assets for “ultra high net worth individuals, their families and foundations,” according to Worth.

I hereby declare that every non-millionaire incarcerated in Colorado – for a similar felony charge or, for that matter, anything – now has a get-out-of-jail-free equal protection claim.

If this worthless piece of garbage:

can butcher productive human beings, then why can’t the neighborhood crack dealers, pimps, child molesters and politicians?

Smith Barney…

They game the legal system the old fashioned way; they just buy preferential treatment for people who have never done anything productive and simply waste resources by virtue of their very existence.

Numerous federal and state statutes prohibit me from expressing my true feelings about Lord Erzinger of Flatulence Mountain – not to mention Mark “leave off the ‘bert’; I think most people will from now on” Hurlbert – so I’ll leave it there.

3 Responses to We Are Now France And The Year Just Became 1789

  1. Megan says:

    Remember kids: if you can’t buy your way out of the time, don’t do the crime!

  2. Kathy says:

    Privilege – etymologically “private law” or law relating to a specific individual–is a special entitlement or granted by a government or other authority to a restricted group, either by birth or on a conditional basis.

    Next up – reinstating droit de seigneur?
    ===================================

    Arthur: The Lady of the Lake, her arm clad in the purest shimmering samite held aloft Excalibur from the bosom of the water, signifying by divine providence that I, Arthur, was to carry Excalibur. THAT is why I am your king!

    Dennis: (interrupting) Listen, strange women lyin’ in ponds distributin’ swords is no basis for a system of government! Supreme executive power derives from a mandate from the masses, not from some farcicial aquatic ceremony!

  3. ezs says:

    Geez- that troll really makes me want to retch.

    I would appreciate it if you read my blog, http://emilysvirtualrocket.blogspot.com. The blog is a virtual compendium of articles from newspapers, newsweeklies, and magazines, both popular and scholarly. The articles have a viewpoint toward transgender / transsexual news. If you like it, please put
    “Emily’s virtual rocket “under the title commonly called
    “Blogroll”. Thank you so much!

    Sincerely,

    ezs

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